muted

yeah. no feelings.

you've been fighting traffic for the past 30 minutes and it's starting to wear on you. "yeah" by lcd soundsystem comes on shuffle just before you reach the whitestone bridge. you love this song so much. your ipod has been on fire so far. as you cross the bridge, the highway widens, the traffic lightens and "yeah" becomes more intense. you're able to bully the pedal for the first time in too long. as your speed increases while the song hits its peak, you feel a sense of elation to be heading away from the place where you can't even breathe without overthinking it.

the first time you hear your voice all trip is when the sex pistols' "no feelings" gets shuffled onto your speakers. as the chorus begins, you're surprised to hear yourself screaming along.

no feeeeeeeeeeliiiiiiiings
no feeeeeeeeeeliiiiiiiings
no feeeeeeeeeeliiiiiiiings
for anybody else
except for myself
my beautiful self

this is almost funny to you because, in reality, you have too many feelings and you're the furthest from beautiful you've ever been.