5.31.2007
infection
today marked another accomplishment. i watched "28 days later"...all by myself. woo hoo! now drew and i can see "28 weeks later." nice.
* * *
"geez. are you as depressed as you seem?"
i turn both palms up and raise them with my shoulders as if to say "i don't know, you tell me."
"this feels like a dentist appointment...like i'm pulling teeth."
"i'm sorry."
"it's ok. i've just never seen you this solemn."
"i don't really have much to say...i mean...i think about the questions you've asked tonight all the time...but i don't have any answers."
"lots of questions, no answers, eh?"
"something like that."
* * *
i feel so sharply disconnected from my recent past. it's like i've been pushed off the side of a boat in the middle of the ocean. my flailing has brought a lifeboat to me and there are familiar faces leaning over its side with outstretched arms. i can see lips moving but the voices have collided into one indecipherable mess and all i really want to do is stop fighting, take one last breath, close my eyes and go under.
today marked another accomplishment. i watched "28 days later"...all by myself. woo hoo! now drew and i can see "28 weeks later." nice.
* * *
"geez. are you as depressed as you seem?"
i turn both palms up and raise them with my shoulders as if to say "i don't know, you tell me."
"this feels like a dentist appointment...like i'm pulling teeth."
"i'm sorry."
"it's ok. i've just never seen you this solemn."
"i don't really have much to say...i mean...i think about the questions you've asked tonight all the time...but i don't have any answers."
"lots of questions, no answers, eh?"
"something like that."
* * *
i feel so sharply disconnected from my recent past. it's like i've been pushed off the side of a boat in the middle of the ocean. my flailing has brought a lifeboat to me and there are familiar faces leaning over its side with outstretched arms. i can see lips moving but the voices have collided into one indecipherable mess and all i really want to do is stop fighting, take one last breath, close my eyes and go under.
